SHOULD YOU UNPLUG YOUR WEDDING?
GUESTS, CAMERAS AND A MODERN DILEMMA
Picture this: you’re halfway down the aisle, your favourite song floating in the air, the moment you’ve dreamed of finally happening… and Auntie Daphne steps out with her iPad the size of a tea tray. She finally takes her seat, but misses the rest of the ceremony in real time, because she’s having an arm workout holding technology instead.
Welcome to the great debate: to unplug, or not to unplug?
Over the past few years, “unplugged weddings” where guests are asked to put away their phones and cameras, have gone from quirky idea to near-religion for some couples. For others, it feels a bit joyless. After all, don’t we live in an age where “pictures or it didn’t happen” is practically law? So let’s talk through it, honestly. The good, the bad, and the auntie, and of course uncle with, say, an iPad.
The Case for an Unplugged Wedding
1. You get faces, not phones.
When guests aren’t holding devices, you get those beautiful, unguarded moments; tears, smiles, and laughter, rather than a sea of glowing screens. The emotional connection between the couple and guests feels more authentic when people are actually there, rather than curating their next post.
2. Your photographer can do their job.
Speaking as someone who’s spent more hours than I’d like to admit dodging elbows, lenses, and selfie sticks, I can tell you: it makes a difference. A professional photographer’s job is to capture the day as it unfolds naturally. That’s tricky when every key moment has a relative crouched in the aisle like they’re covering a football final. I do often wonder too, what they’re really going to do with these pictures?
3. You reclaim the moment.
There’s something magical about keeping the ceremony sacred, the quiet before the party starts. Without phones buzzing and flashes going off, it feels like everyone’s breathing the same air, sharing one story in real time.
4. Better photos (ironically).
Fewer distractions mean your pro photographer can capture clean, timeless images. No one wants that perfect kiss shot ruined by a guest peering over their phone with the intensity of a wildlife photographer spotting a rare heron.
But Let’s Be Fair — The Case Against an Unplugged Wedding
1. Guests love to capture joy.
People reach for their cameras because they care. They want to remember, to share, to feel part of your story. Sometimes that blurry phone shot of Grandma laughing at the speeches is the one you’ll treasure the most.
2. Social media is the modern confetti.
For some couples, having guests post on Instagram with your wedding hashtag isn’t a distraction; it’s part of the fun. Those photos go up fast, letting friends who couldn’t make it feel included. And let’s face it, there’s a little ego boost in seeing “Best wedding ever!” trending before you’ve even had cake.
3. Cameras connect generations.
You’ll often see grandparents proudly holding up tablets and teenagers streaming for distant relatives. It’s messy, yes, but it’s also a reminder of how technology has made moments instantly shareable. If handled with care, it can feel like your wedding is stretching its arms around the world.
4. You can’t unplug enthusiasm.
Some guests just love taking photos, it’s how they engage. Asking them to stop can feel like asking them not to clap. For the natural documentarians in your circle, taking pictures is how they say, “This matters to me.”
So What’s the Balance?
Like most things wedding-related, there’s no one-size-fits-all answer. But there is a middle ground.
Consider making just the ceremony unplugged. That keeps the most meaningful part phone-free, while giving guests freedom to photograph the fun bits: the confetti, the dancing, the slightly wobbly moments at the end of the night.
Or, give your guests a specific time: “Once we’ve said ‘I do,’ go wild.” That way, everyone’s happy, and your photographer still gets the clean, emotional shots that define the day.
You can even make a game of it: give guests disposable cameras for the reception. You’ll end up with some beautifully candid (and occasionally baffling) pictures that might become unexpected favourites.
A Note from the Photographer’s Corner
When I photograph weddings, I never want guests to feel like they can’t enjoy themselves or take part. But I’ve seen both sides. I’ve watched couples hold their breath as they walk into a ceremony framed not by faces, but by lenses. I’ve also seen the joy in a friend’s spontaneous selfie that ends up becoming a shared memory for years.
If you’re torn, think about what you want your day to feel like. Calm? Intimate? Lively? Unplugged might fit. Or do you want buzz, chatter, flashes of laughter (and actual flashes)? Then let the cameras roll.
Because in the end, whether your wedding is lit by candlelight or the light of fifty screens, it’s still your story. Just make sure you’re the one in the middle of it, not watching it through someone else’s phone.
For more wedding advice, visit the KEEP CALM PODCAST on this page and through Spotify.
